SUNDAY SPECIAL- MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE
A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE &FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender.'

************ ********* ********* *
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.


FEMALE PROCEDURE:
What is really funny is that most of this part is the Truth!

1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up..
6. Attempt to insert card into machine...
7.. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8.. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt..
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside..
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24.. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone..
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.

SEND THIS TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH,
AND TO THE LADIES who can handle it.... they need a laugh,

Marwadi at his best...

(Just on the lighter vane....no offence meant)



Marwadi: What's the rate of the banana?

Shopkeeper: 1 Rupee

Marwadi: Will u give in 60 paise?

Shopkeeper: only the cover.

Marwadi: Take 40 paisa, keep the cover and give me the rest...





Marwadi falls from the 14th floor...

While falling he sees his wife from his kitchen window, preparing
food...

he shouted: do not prepare for meeeee....





Marwadi saved a Sheikh's life by donating him his blood.

Sheikh gifted him a Mercedez.

Next time Sheikh again needed blood.

Marwadi donated again..

This time the Sheikh gifted him a toffee, seeing which the Marwadi said:
Where's the car?

Sheikh: Well... the Marwadi's blood is now ruuning inside me too...





Marwadi called a newspaper office and asked: My uncle is dead and I
want a condolence to be printed. What are the charges?

NewsPaper: Rs.50 per word.

Marwadi: Oh!!! too much... Anyway write, "Uncle Dead"

Newspaper: Sir! It should be minimum 5 words!

Marwadi: Oh ho! Let me think... Ok write, "Uncle Dead, Maruti for sale"





There was a Marwadi too aboard the sinking Titanic. He was laughing
while the ship was sinking.

His friend asked: Why r u laughing?

Marwadi: Thank God I didn't buy the return ticket...

Traffic fine registered until now

If you have violated any traffic rules and have payed a fine then check the link below:

http://125.17.140.50/bpsfinedetails/bpsfinedetails.aspx