Tuesday, May 31, 2011

If Lion goes Onsite...



In a poor zoo of India , a lion was frustrated as he was offered not more than 1 kg meat a day.

The lion thought its prayers were answered when one US Zoo Manager visited the zoo and requested the zoo management to shift the lion to the US Zoo.

The lion was so happy and started thinking of a central A/c environment, a goat or two every day and a US Green Card also. On its first day after arrival, the lion was offered a big bag, sealed very nicely for breakfast.

The lion opened it quickly but was shocked to see that it contained few bananas. Then the lion thought that may be they cared too much for him as they were worried about his stomach as he had recently shifted from India .

The next day the same thing happened. On the third day again the same food bag of bananas was delivered.

The lion was so furious, it stopped the delivery boy and blasted at him, 'Don't you know I am the lion...king of the Jungle..., what's wrong with your management?, what nonsense is this?, why are you delivering bananas to me?'

The delivery boy politely said, 'Sir, I know you are the king of the jungle but .. Did you know that you have been brought here on a monkey's visa !!!!!'

Moral of Story : Better to be a Lion in India, than a Monkey elsewhere !! JJ

http://www.ziddu.com/download/15198560/IfLiongoesOnsite...pdf.html

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Tips for good health

GOOD SLEEPING HABITS
1.Evening at 9 - 11pm: is the time for eliminating unnecessary/ toxic chemicals (detoxification) from the antibody system (lymph nodes). This time duration should be spent by relaxing or listening to music. If during this time a housewife is still in an unrelaxed state such as washing the dishes or monitoring children doing their homework, this will have a negative impact on health.
2.Evening at 11pm - 1am: is the detoxification process in the liver, and ideally should be done in a deep sleep state.
3.Early morning 1 - 3am: detoxification process in the gall, also ideally done in a deep sleep state. 4.Early morning 3 - 5am: detoxification in the lungs. Therefore there will sometimes be a severe cough for cough sufferers during this time. Since the detoxification process had reached the respiratory tract, there is no need to take cough medicine so as not to interfere with toxin removal process.
5.Morning 5 - 7am: detoxification in the colon, you should empty your bowel.
6.Morning 7 - 9am: absorption of nutrients in the small intestine, you should be having breakfast at this time. Breakfast should be earlier, before 6:30am, for those who are sick. Breakfast before 7:30am is very beneficial to those wanting to stay fit. Those who always skip breakfast, they should change their habits, and it is still better to eat breakfast late until 9 - 10am rather than no meal at all.
7.Sleeping so late and waking up too late will disrupt the process of removing unnecessary chemicals. Aside from that, midnight to 4:00 am is the time when the bone marrow produces blood. Therefore, have a good sleep and don't sleep late.
CANCER CAUSING FOODS
1. Hot dogs
Because they are high in nitrates, the Cancer Prevention Coalition advises that children eat no more than 12 hot dogs a month. If you can't live without hot dogs, buy those made without sodium nitrate.
2. Processed meats and bacon
Also high in the same sodium nitrates found in hot dogs, bacon, and other processed meats raise the risk of heart disease. The saturated fat in bacon also contributes to cancer.
3. Doughnuts
Doughnuts are cancer-causing double trouble. First, they are made with white flour, sugar, and hydrogenated oils, then fried at high temperatures. Doughnuts, says Adams , may be the worst food you can possibly eat to raise your risk of cancer.
4. French fries
Like doughnuts, French fries are made with hydrogenated oils and then fried at high temperatures. They also contain cancer- causing acryl amides which occur during the frying process. They should be called cancer fries, not French fries, said Adams ..
5. Chips, crackers, and cookies
All are usually made with white flour and sugar. Even the ones whose labels claim to be free of trans-fats generally contain small amounts of trans-fats.
BRAIN DAMAGING HABITS
1. No Breakfast
People who do not take breakfast are going to have a lower blood sugar level.
This leads to an insufficient supply of nutrients to the brain causing brain degeneration.
2. Overeating
It causes hardening of the brain arteries, leading to a decrease in mental power.
3. Smoking
It causes multiple brain shrinkage and may lead to Alzheimer disease.
4. High Sugar consumption
Too much sugar will interrupt the absorption of proteins and nutrients causing malnutrition and may interfere with brain development.
5. Air Pollution
The brain is the largest oxygen consumer in our body. Inhaling polluted air decreases the supply of oxygen to the brain, bringing about a decrease in brain efficiency.
6. Sleep Deprivation
Sleep allows our brain to rest. Long term deprivation from sleep will accelerate the death of brain cells.
7. Head covered while sleeping
Sleeping with the head covered increases the concentration of carbon dioxide and decrease concentration of oxygen that may lead to brain damaging effects.
8. Working your brain during illness
Working hard or studying with sickness may lead to a decrease in effectiveness of the brain as well as damage the brain.
9. Lacking in stimulating thoughts
Thinking is the best way to train our brain, lacking in brain stimulation thoughts may cause brain shrinkage.
10. Talking Rarely
Intellectual conversations will promote the efficiency of the brain
LIVER DAMAGING HABITS
1. Sleeping too late and waking up too late are main cause.
2. Too much eating.
3. Skipping breakfast.
4. Consuming too much medication.
5. Consuming too much preservatives, additives, food coloring, and artificial sweetener.
6. Consuming unhealthy cooking oil. As much as possible reduce cooking oil use when frying, which includes even the best cooking oils like olive oil. Do not consume fried foods when you are tired, except if the body is very fit.
7. Consuming raw (overly done) foods also add to the burden of liver.
Veggies should be eaten raw or cooked 3-5 parts. Fried veggies should be finished in one sitting, do not store.
We should prevent this without necessarily spending more. We just have to adopt a good daily lifestyle and eating habits. Maintaining good eating habits and time condition are very important for our bodies to absorb and get rid of unnecessary chemicals according to "schedule."

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Kanimozhi's FB Wall leaked - LOL!!!

Kanimozhi's FB Wall leaked - LOL!!! Posting and messages with Rahul Gandhi,Abhishek, Raja, Jayalalithaa, Karunanidhi

http://www.ziddu.com/download/15053608/KanimozhisFBWallleaked-LOL.pdf.html

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

ISKON Akshyapatra

How wonderful and thoughtful it would have been if
lavish money thrown over IPL Cricket was used for
these humanitarian works by the sponsors....

This is the initiative of ISKON founder Acharya to see nobody is hungry within the 10km radius of ISKON temple.

http://www.ziddu.com/download/15025798/Akshayapatra.pdf.html

Monday, May 16, 2011

Wonderful English from Around the World

Wonderful English from Around the World

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen :
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

In a Bangkok temple :
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

Cocktail lounge, Norway :
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

Doctors office, Rome :
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Dry cleaners, Bangkok :
DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.

In a Nairobi restaurant :
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

On the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi :
TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.

On a poster at:
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP.

In a City restaurant :
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.

In a cemetery :
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations :
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant :
OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

In a Tokyo bar :
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel , Yugoslavia :
THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel, Japan :
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery :
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest :
IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Hotel, Zurich :
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand :
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

A laundry in Rome :
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Line of Fire....

Actual Line of Fire explained to IT Project Manager

A real story... A conversation between a passenger and Project Manager
in Shatabdi Train...........

Vivek Pradhan was not a happy man.. Even the plush comfort of the
air-conditioned compartment of the Shatabdi express could not cool his
frayed nerves. He was the Project Manager and still not entitled to air
travel.

It was not the prestige he sought, he had tried to reason with the
administration person, it was the savings in time.
As PM, he had so many things to do!!

He opened his case and took out the laptop, determined to put the time
to some good use.

'Are you from the software industry sir,' the man beside him was staring
appreciatively at the laptop.

Vivek glanced briefly and mumbled in affirmation, handling the laptop
now with exaggerated care and importance as if it were an expensive car.

'You people have brought so much advancement to the country, Sir. Today
everything is getting computerized. '

'Thanks,' smiled Vivek, turning around to give the man a look. He always
found it difficult to resist appreciation.

The man was young and stockily built like a sportsman... .. He looked
simple and strangely out of place in that little lap of luxury like a
small town boy in a prep school. He probably was a railway sportsman
making the most of his free traveling pass.

'You people always amaze me,' the man continued, 'You sit in an office
and write something on a computer and it does so many big things
outside.'

Vivek smiled deprecatingly. Naiveness demanded reasoning not anger.
'It is not as simple as that my friend. It is not just a question of
writing a few lines. There is a lot of process that goes behind it.'
For a moment, he was tempted to explain the entire Software Development
Lifecycle but restrained himself to a single statement.

'It is complex, very complex.'

'It has to be. No wonder you people are so highly paid,' came the reply.

This was not turning out as Vivek had thought. A hint of belligerence
crept into his so far affable, persuasive tone. '

Everyone just sees the money. No one sees the amount of hard work we
have to put in. Indians have such a narrow concept of hard work.
Just because we sit in an air-conditioned office, does not mean our
brows do not sweat. You exercise the muscle; we exercise the mind and
believe me
that is no less taxing.'

He could see, he had the man where he wanted, and it was time to drive
home the point.

'Let me give you an example. Take this train. The entire railway
reservation system is computerized. You can book a train ticket between
any two stations from any of the hundreds of computerized booking
centers across the country.
Thousands of transactions accessing a single database, at a time
concurrently; data integrity, locking, data security.
Do you understand the complexity in designing and coding such a system?'

The man was awestruck; quite like a child at a planetarium. This was
something big and beyond his imagination.

'You design and code such things.'

'I used to,' Vivek paused for effect, 'but now I am the Project
Manager.'

'Oh!' sighed the man, as if the storm had passed over, 'so your life is
easy now.'

This was like the last straw for Vivek.
He retorted, 'Oh come on, does life ever get easy as you go up the
ladder. Responsibility only brings more work. Design and coding! That is
the easier part. Now I do not do it, but I am responsible for it and
believe me, that is far more stressful.
My job is to get the work done in time and with the highest quality.

To tell you about the pressures, there is the customer at one end,
always changing his requirements, the user at the other, wanting
something else, and your boss, always expecting you to have finished it
yesterday.'

Vivek paused in his diatribe, his belligerence fading with
self-realization.
What he had said, was not merely the outburst of a wronged man, it was
the truth. And one need not get angry while defending the truth.

'My friend,' he concluded triumphantly, 'you don't know what it is to be
in the Line of Fire'.

The man sat back in his chair, his eyes closed as if in realization.
When he spoke after sometime, it was with a calm certainty that
surprised Vivek.
'I know sir,..... I know what it is to be in the Line of Fire......'

He was staring blankly, as if no passenger, no train existed, just a
vast expanse of time.

'There were 30 of us when we were ordered to capture Point 4875 in the
cover of the night.
The enemy was firing from the top. There was no knowing where the next
bullet was going to come from and for whom.
In the morning when we finally hoisted the tri-colour at the top only 4
of us were alive.'

'You are a...?'

'I am Subedar Sushant from the 13 J&K Rifles on duty at Peak 4875 in
Kargil. They tell me I have completed my term and can opt for a soft
assignment.
But, tell me sir, can one give up duty just because it makes life
easier.

On the dawn of that capture, one of my colleagues lay injured in the
snow, open to enemy fire while we were hiding behind a bunker.
It was my job to go and fetch that soldier to safety. But my captain
sahib refused me permission and went ahead himself.
He said that the first pledge he had taken as a Gentleman Cadet was to
put the safety and welfare of the nation foremost followed by the safety
and welfare of the men he commanded... ....his own personal safety came
last, always and every time.'

'He was killed as he shielded and brought that injured soldier into the
bunker.. Every morning thereafter, as we stood guard, I could see him
taking
all those bullets, which were actually meant for me .
I know sir....I know, what it is to be in the Line of Fire.'

Vivek looked at him in disbelief not sure of how to respond. Abruptly,
he switched off the laptop.

It seemed trivial, even insulting to edit a Word document in the
presence of a man for whom valor and duty was a daily part of life;
valor and sense of
duty which he had so far attributed only to epical heroes.

The train slowed down as it pulled into the station, and Subedar
Sushant picked up his bags to alight.

'It was nice meeting you sir.' Vivek fumbled with the handshake.

This hand... had climbed mountains, pressed the trigger, and hoisted
the tri-colour. Suddenly, as if by impulse, he stood up at attention and
his
right hand went up in an impromptu salute....

It was the least he felt he could do for the country.

PS: The incident he narrated during the capture of Peak 4875 is a
true-life incident during the Kargil war. Capt. Batra sacrificed his
life while trying
to save one of the men he commanded, as victory was within sight.
For this and various other acts of bravery, he was awarded the Param
Vir Chakra, the nation's highest military award.

Live Humbly, There Are Great People Around Us, Let Us Learn!

BE POLITE... EVERYONE YOU MEET IS FIGHTING A HARD BATTLE !

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Vocab Genius/Jobless ?

The person who invented this sentence is either a Vocabulary GENIUS or is absolutely JOBLESS!!!

Why?
You'll soon find out !!!
Read the sentence below carefully...

"I do not know where family doctors acquired illegibly perplexing handwriting nevertheless, extraordinary pharmaceutical intellectuality counterbalancing indecipherability, transcendentalizes intercommunications incomprehensibleness".

This is completely a meaningful sentence.
This is a sentence where the Nth word is N letters long.
e.g. 3rd word is 3 letters long, 8th word is 8 letters long and so on..

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Rajinikanths' calendar - April month


Rajinikanth's April month starts with 2nd, because nobody can fool Rajini.....